Forgiving Ourselves: Part 4 of 5 in the Series "Forgiveness"

We cannot go into the past and correct our mistakes, but we can learn from them

2 Corinthians 5:17---Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!

• God desires us to be free from past guilt 
• When Jesus died on the cross all of our sins died with him 
• It doesn’t matter what we may have done when we repented and asked for forgiveness it was granted

Colossians 1:21-22 ---Once you were alienated from God and were enemies in your minds because of your evil behavior.  But now he has reconciled you by Christ’s physical body through death to present you holy in God’s sight, without blemish and free from accusation.

What does self forgiveness look like

1. Accepting ourselves as a human who has faults and makes mistakes
2. Letting go of self-anger for our past failures, errors and mistakes
3. Loving ourselves

Seeking Forgiveness: Part 3 of 5 in the Series "Forgiveness"

1 John 1:8-9 … If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us.  If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.

When we seek forgiveness it should come from the heart.  I would like to share with you a list of particles to consider:

1. Think about what happened and what it is you are sorry for
2. Write down your apology
3. Practice what you plan to say until you feel comfortable
4. State clearly what it is you are sorry for doing
5. Acknowledge your actions without making excuses
6. Share your feelings about what happened – avoid blaming, exaggerating or saying empty words
7. Listen to the other person’s response without getting defensive
8. Offer to make amends if appropriate
9. Move on.  Once you’ve apologized, let it go – don’t force the issue give the other person time

Forgiving Others: Part 2 of 5 in the Series "Forgiveness"

Forgiveness is all we can do.  It is not for us to make people see our point or to see their error or how they may have wronged us.  That’s God’s job and the sooner we accept that the better off we will be.

Romans 12:19-21 --- Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay.” Says the Lord.  On the Contrary: “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.  In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.”  Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

Look at verse 21 – Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. 

I would overlook this part of the passage and focus only on the part that says God will avenge; however when I did that I was still being overcome by evil and not forgiving.  I would do things or say things that sounded good and then sit back and wait for God to step in and show the other person how they hurt me or punish them for the wrong I felt they had done to me.  That was the wrong heart.  I have learned that to overcome evil with good my actions have to be from that place deep inside my heart.  I have to be able to freely give and do with out holding on and looking to see when the other person will be made to pay for the wrong they did to me.

Forgiveness doesn’t mean opening yourself back up to hurt

Forgiveness doesn’t mean allowing the other person’s behavior to continue

I have realized that there are some situations that I have to remove myself from.  Some people in this world are just evil and all I can do is pray for them and move on, but in doing that I still have to truly forgive them.  Even though I may choose to not have them as a part of my life I still have to let go of the wrong they may have done and forgive them from my heart. 

Forgiveness sets you free

Mark 11:25--- Jesus said, “When you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.”

Forgiveness lets you remove the pain you carry inside of you that you feel was done by someone else. The other person does not have to admit that they ever did you wrong and they don’t have to come and apologize.  The other person doesn’t have to do anything.  Forgiveness is something done inside of ourselves, to release us from the pain that we feel.

Forgiveness releases our need for revenge

Forgiveness means letting go of the pain we feel inside ourselves

Forgiveness is possible in any situation

Start forgiving and letting go in little ways:

1. Stop looking funny at the friend that didn’t invite you to their last event.
2. Don’t hold it against the person who forgot to return your phone call.
3. Forgive the co-worker who seems to let you do all the work and then they take all the credit

Led to Forgive: Part 1 of 5 in the Series "Forgiveness"

Wind so intense it causes tall trees to bend to the ground, waves that rise and crash ferociously tossing and scattering mighty ships as though they were mere toys, flames that lick and lap in an entrancing dance, engulfing everything within its span, all symbols of rage; a rage that if left unchecked spreads rapidly and without control.  A rage that burns so deeply within, it slowly pulls you into its vortex, leaving you paralyzed never to regain your equilibrium again.

This is the rage I allowed to consume me from the inside out.  In September of 2009, I lost my youngest sister to a car accident.  While she was hit from behind and her vehicle was knocked off the road, the driver of the car that hit her was never charged with any crimes.  He was not even given a blood alcohol test to confirm his level of sobriety. 

It was beyond my comprehension, how someone could be allowed to take a life and severely injury two others, yet be free to live, love and laugh, without having to give any account for his actions.

Psalm 139:23-24 --- Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.  See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. 

This was my prayer for many, many months during the later part of 2009 and 2010.  Sure, I was able to go through my day and more times than not it would appear on the surface that everything was OK.  However, looks can be very deceiving. 

In the beginning I told myself I was just going through the normal cycle of grief, but slowly I began to realize that something was not so normal about what I was feeling.  Little things were beginning to annoy me, things that I would normally shrug of and not give a second thought to.  I also noticed that I was becoming very distant and withdrawn.  Finally, friends and family began to ask question like, “Are you OK?” “Is everything alright?”  “Would you like to talk about it?” 

It was then that I realized I needed to cry out to God and ask him to search my heart.  To plead with him to reveal to me any bitterness or anger that I was holding inside.  It was then that I held on to Psalm 46:10 and became still in the presence of God.  It was also during this time that I studied out true forgiveness. 

Over the next five weeks I will share with you the thoughts, feelings and struggles I encountered along the road to forgiveness.  I encourage you to join in the discussion.  

1. Have you ever experienced something so painful that you thought you could never move forward?
2. Have you overcome and forgiven?
3. How did you see God moving in your life during this time?

Everyone has a story; God has used all of us in some way.  Why not start today to begin to share yours.

A Glimpse of the Old

...and when he found him, he brought him to Antioch.  So for a whole year Barnabas and Saul met with the church and taught great numbers of people.  The disciples were called Christians first at Antioch.

Wow!! Amazing, the disciples did not have the luxury of choosing the name Christians.  It was thrust upon them.  The scriptures say that they were "CALLED" Christians first, implying that because of their way of life they were behaving in a manner that exemplified Jesus.

As we prepare to embark on the year 2011, let's take a moment an look at our walk through 2010.  Asking ourselves:

1. Was I like Christ in my speech?
2. Would my co-workers consider me a Christians based on my work ethics?
3. Did I love the way Christ calls me to love?
4. Would someone merely looking on as I move through my day call me a Christian?

Remember, God is a God of grace and each new day provides us with the opportunity to begin again.  Welcome to the first day of the rest of your life.  Choose God and may the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.